My 25 Favorite Video Games of All Time: #25 Mechwarrior 4: Vengeance

Mechwarrior 4: Vengeance (2000) PC

Let me take you back in time.
Christmas day 2000. A 13 year old Joystik awakes from a night of fitful slumber to find a mountain of presents Ol' St. Nick has deposited under the plastic christmas tree. In a flurry of childish glee, I take to the wrapping paper like a honey badger to a delicious snake, ripping and tearing as fast as my pubescent arms could flail. It was quite the haul this year. New bike, CDs, anime, and Nintendo 64 games to beat the band. Just as I thought there was no more, my lovely mother drags a large wrapped box from the closet. My sister and I pounce upon the wondrous gift and shortly after, an HP computer, our first computer, is sitting before us. We carefully open the box and sitting inside is a copy of Mechwarrior 4: Vengeance. My very first PC game.

Fast forward a few hours. My mother is finished setting up the blue and white behemoth and I get my first blurry glimpse into the wonderful world of PC gaming.

Mechwarrior 4: Vengeance is a First Person Mech Simulator game that drops you into Battletech universe, or more specifically,  into the shoes of Ian Dresari, a mech pilot battling to free his planet and reclaim the throne from the evil Steiner forces.

I didn't play the game for the plot, though, there were some fantastically awful live action cutscenes. I played the game for the intense mech on mech combat. (that sounded dirty, don't look too much into that)

As a giant robot anime fan, I could not have asked for a better game. You are given access to a massive garage in which to build and customize your giant strolling death machine to your heart's content. Sure, you could always pick the stock, prebuilt machines, but the real fun was refining your bot to your own meticulous standards. Want a nimble machine loaded down with flak shotguns and short range cluster missiles to run circles around your opponent whilst blasting them to scrap, you can do that.  Maybe you want a monstrosity encumbered with more long range missiles then most first world nations to sit in the rear and nuke everything to kingdom come? Go for it. Perhaps a shiny laser mecha that has enough firepower to blow a neat little hole in the moon? Shine on you crazy diamond. It is all left up to your imagination.

The insane customization is balanced by a comprehensive resource management system. You want that formidable laser mech loaded with beam weapons akin to a bipedal Death Star, well you better have enough heat sinks, coolant and power generators to handle the immense amount of heat being generated with each volley or you will be overheating in no time. I hope you packed enough long range missiles in that mobile Howitzer or you'll be nothing more than a 100 ton target dummy. It's really quite strategic and you must constantly weigh your options in the heat of battle.

The biggest challenge you'll encounter in the game, besides the extremely skilled competition, is the complex controls. you are literally piloting this robot and there is hundreds of input commands at your disposal. everything from simply controlling the speed, pitch and yaw of your mech to deactivating your electronic components to keep from being scanned to jettisoning fuel and excess armor for a last ditch speed boost. its all very confusing at first and is quite the steep learning curve to master. I recommend buying a flight stick peripheral and mapping the important inputs to the buttons.

Once you learn to control your battle machine like earth bound Amuro Ray, you have an extensive online multiplayer suite to explore. This was the first game I ever played online and it was quite an experience, even on my slow 56k connection. Many of the industry standards we see today were present: Team Death Match, Free-For-All, Capture the Flag just to name a few. The competition was absolutely cutthroat and having only text based communications made team matches a chaotic, but fun mess. After a few hours, you learn what style and techniques work for you and you start blowing mech arms off with the best of them.

Wait, did I forget to mention that you can target individual mech parts? I did, well you totally can! Sure, blasting an enemy in the cockpit will result in a kill, but its often the most armored section of the opponent and nothing short of launching Wolverine into the faceplate is will get a one hit kill. Instead, try blowing his less armored legs out from under him and laugh as your LRM totting teammate lobs fiery death at his immobile ass from across the map. I swear to the heavens, that some of the most imaginative, impromptu moments in my multiplayer history occurred in this one game.

Yes, he is indeed firing his lazors!

When it is all said and done, Mechwarrior 4: Vengeance sparked my love of PC gaming and is a damn fine game in its own right. It's giant robot fighting at it's best and has more then earned a place on my list.

Stay tuned for #24 in a few days. Until then my friends, remember, you can never have enough heat sinks.

Cheers

Joystik.

My 25 Favorite Video Games of All Time: Introduction

Hello and salutations dear readers.

I had a conversation the other night over Twitter that really stuck with me for some reason. It was concerning Bioshock and if I made a list of my favorite video games, where exactly would it land. So I got to thinking, I say something is "one of my favorite games of all time" without actually having the physical list to reference. I don't think of myself as a liar, so I set out today to compile my favorite games on an easy to reference list.

While compiling the list, I found myself going over in my head just why this and that particular game has stood out in my mind for so long and I was soon fondly reminiscing back to the halcyon days of my youth and how these games have done so much to influence the person typing before you today. so along with each game, I'm going to share with you just why it has impacted me so.

Now to set a few ground rules.

1. This is the list of MY favorite games. If you find yourself disagreeing with me whilst clenching your fists in balled rage, that is to be expected. The world would be boring and very unsexy if it was populated by clones of me. If you feel you must express your displeasure at my obvious inferior list, please do so constructively. This is a labor of love, a celebration of what gaming has meant to me, and I intend to finish come hell or rampant trolling.

2. There will only be games I've played on the list. I'm sure Uncharted 2 was amazing and i'm a blind, unsexy fool to exclude it from the list. But poor, impoverished Joystik has never purchased a PS3 and therefore must be left out of all the swashbuckling fun. Regardless, if I haven't played it, It's not making the list. Sorry

3. I will try to keep it to one entry per series. I will tell you now that I fail miserably in this endeavor. There are 2 series that I just cannot ignore. To do so is betraying the integrity of the list and I would rather go back on a rule then to lie to myself.

4. Stories and plots can and WILL be spoiled. I will try my darnedest to throw up spoiler warnings before I reveal anything too critical but story is a major factor in whether or not I will like a game. and to not explain my feelings completely is doing a disservice to myself and the people reading *SPOILER WARNING* Darth Vader kills Dumbledore by throwing Keyser Soze at him during a dream sequence in the mind of an autistic child.

5. Format and Timeline  There will be a separate post per game and I'll try to have them up every other day. Real life does happen and sometimes I won't be able to post for a bit, but take heart lovely readers, I have every intention of finishing this list.

Now with all the nuts and bolts out of the way, we can proceed to the list proper. Look for #25 later tonight

Cheers

Joystik

Keep Calm and Flutter On- Episode Recap

Lock up your wives and daughters and hide the fine china because it's EPISODE RECAP TIME!

The good folks at Studio B have delivered unto us yet another polarizing episode. The last time around, we had the (unintentional?) character heel-turn for Spike and its seems this weekend's episode has another beloved member of the cast doing something similar...only this time its the one and only DISCORD! King of Chaos, Master of Mischief, Lord of Loki-Type Antics, The Colossus of Clout. (maybe that last one doesnt quite fit) How is the writers going to make THE chaos sower in this universe settle down and behave himself? Short answer: they kinda pull it out from betwixt their buttocks with the help of our favorite yellow winged proctologist. Long answer: well, lets continue on and find out.

 The episode begins with 4 out of 6 element bearers standing in a field, anxiously awaiting the arrival of Princess Lazy-Pants (TO THE MOOOOOOOON!!!) and she is not alone. Seems that Celestia needs the power of Discord for some extreamly unspecified reason and wants the Mane 6 and Fluttershy in particular to rehabilitate the demi-god to make him the Draconoquus-shaped chaos missile that Celestia needs in order to conquer the world (or so I assume) So after a confrontation with a foul-mouthed beaver, the girls reunite to release Discord from his stony prison...with rainbows. Being a statue seems to have cramped Discord's style and he proceeds to change cute, cuddly woodland critters into the kinda muscle-bound mooks you wouldnt want to run into in a dark alley. After a series of hilarious sight gags, Fluttershy grows weary of Discord hamming it up and attempts the dreaded "Stare" on him (it's not very effective...) but after threatening him with their plot devices, Discord relents...kinda (FORESHADOWING!) and heads off to Fluttershy's cottage for his "rehabilitation"

The ponies, doubting Discord's sincerity, warn Fluttershy, but she has a plan. She is gonna kill him...with kindness. the whole sequence is a testament to the art of visual humor, with some truly laugh out loud moments, mostly at Angel Bunny's expense. ( I really want that lamp) Discord really has no intention to reform and decides to use Fluttershy's trusting nature to his advantage through his usual methods of insanity. One floating, rotating cottage later and now its time for a dinner party. In the immortal words of Samuel L. Jackson "Hang on to your butts"

The dinner scene is one that the fans will be taking about forever and for good reason. Its beauty and the beast, filtered through a LSD lens. every joke hits and Fluttershy's commitment to the unruly demi-god is baffling to her friends, but Discord shows a blink-and-you-miss-it feeling of remorse for what he has done, but Angel crashes the party with news that Sweet Apple Acres is flooding. (Rarity is damn good at charades, I would have never guessed Sweet Apple Acres from an apple in a pitcher)

The girls arrive to find the inundated acres and Fluttershy reveals that she knows Discord is behind the pranks and she is holding back to gain his trust. Discord enters like a boss and finally plays his hand, stating that he would fix the farm in exchange for Fluttershy never using her Element against him ever again. She agrees and Discord, doing his best Brian Boitano impression, gloats about how he is now free to rain chaos all over the world. Fluttershy denounces their friendship and Discord, right in the middle of his big boisterous villain monologue, does the most sudden heel turn that the planet stopped rotating for a split-second. But, unlike the last episode, I have absolutely zero problems with this for two reasons. 1: it was foreshadowed ever so slightly so it didnt seem like it came completely out of left field and 2: even if it did come from nowhere, that is completely in character for Discord. He IS chaos. What better way to demonstrate that then to turn good on a whim, why, because he can! Besides, he is a chaotic neutral at best. I'm willing to bet we are not done with Discord in a somewhat antagonistic role. Celestia arrives and Discord says the name of the show, the internet EXPLODES. role credits.

I'm fairly certain that I will be in the minority, but I have no problem with this episode and even if I didnt like the ending, the comedy more then makes up for it. This is going down as a classic in my mind (as insane as it may be)

9 out of 10

Discord has yet to pay for his greatest crime, no whipped cream to accompany the chocolate milk rain. I DEMAND JUSTICE!!

The Stars Will Aid in her Escape

The Stars Will Aid in Her Escape- By Joystik

“On the longest day of the thousandth year, the stars will aid in her escape”~ an excerpt from “The Mare in the Moon”

    Waiting. It is all there was to do for…how long was it? Almost 1000 years now. Patiently waiting, but soon, the time for waiting will be over. The former Princess of the moon gazed at the world that expanded out below her. Serene, Peaceful, Waiting. Turning her attention to the heavens, Nightmare Moon looked out at her silent co-conspirators as they slowly inched to position. The points of light moved deliberately into formation, ensuring her release from the celestial body which she took her name from. Ironic, The massive sphere used to bring her comfort on those long, lonely nights in Equestria. Now, it only serves as the prison which kept Luna from her.

Almost time now.


The first 200 years were spent in a state of denial. “How could ‘Tia imprison me here for a millennia!” the midnight blue alicorn cried to the heavens “On MY moon of all places” “This is just like her” she thought to herself between sobs “A few centuries on the moon and I’ll learn my lesson, oh how dear sister loves her lessons.” As the years passed, sadness and self-pity turned to bitterness and hate. The lunar princess would shout ancient curses at the planet in the vain attempt to wound her older sibling. Eventually, There was only silence…and waiting. White-hot vengeance boiled under a barely held cold façade. She could do this, waiting 1000 years is nothing to an immortal being. Revenge would be hers if she just waited.

The final star fell into place.

A sliver of starlight silhouetted the armored alicorn as she rose to her hooves for the first time in several centuries. She unfurled her lithe and powerful wings and coiled her haunches like a snake set to strike. In an instant, she leapt from the celestial prison which she once loved and dove planet-ward. Through the atmosphere, she tore across the sky like a mare possessed . The link between siblings never faded, Nightmare Moon knew exactly where the focus of all her hatred was. Ponyville, its wasn’t far for a pony with her god-like speed and as the wind whipped through her mane, she couldn’t help but smile to herself. The waiting was almost over…

Crash!

A simple wall was all that kept Luna from her prize, it didn’t stand a chance. As the dust settled, the midnight hued alicorn was greeted by the sight of three forms, one much taller then the others. Time was always kind to immortals, Celestia looked almost the same as on the night of her betrayal. The look on her pearlescent sister’s face was the same though, smug, condescending, superior. But the eyes of the solar princess betrayed her feelings: fear. Nightmare Moon, the bane of pony kind, seized the opportunity, “Greeting sister, I’ve been waiting. For. Far. Too. Long”
Inspired By Luna by Eurobeat Brony

Somewhere I belong

Howdy Everypony

I just wanted to make a quick post about my life as a Brony. Since first getting into the show in November of last year, Ive lead a rather sheltered brony life. Sure, ive posted on equestriadaily quite a bit and have made a few friends on the blog, but ive never met another brony in real life. For the longest time, i thought i was the only brony in Pittsburgh. (as absurd as that sounds) My car is decked out in pony stuff and i do wear my clothes out sometimes, hoping to find another brony in my travels. While it has garnered a few weird looks, ive never attained that oh-so-life-affirming brohoof that ive been seeking. This will all change soon. I discovered a group of pittsburgh bronies on facebook and they have been kind enough to invite me not only to join their group, but to come to a meetup at idlewild on the 26th. To say im excited is an understatement. My fiancee is supportive of my hobby, but is not a fan of the show herself, and to finally meet other bronies will be nothing short of awesome.

I look forward to meeting you all very soon.

Thanks

Joystik

My thoughts on the new Amazing Spider-Man movie

Howdy Everypony

I have a little secret for you guys, I am a HUGE Spider-Man fan. I was first introduced to Spider-Man and comics in general when my uncle purchased me a beat up copy of the Amazing Spider-Man #7 from a garage sale in 1992( a rare find but completely worthless in the condition it was in, poor thing) I was greeted on the cover with a picture of Spidey fighting the Vulture, and boy howdy, was i ever excited. That one book lead to toys, posters, blue and red underoos and a life-time appreciation for comics, especially Spider-Man. Though my tastes in the books may have matured, the wall-crawler never faded from my tastes...until one warm May evening back in 2007. I was at the midnight release of Spider-Man 3 and dammit was i ever pissed off about the whole damn movie. Looking back, it wasn't the worst movie I have ever seen, but it poisoned me against Spider-Man. I never had a run of Spider-Man since then. Sure, Ive read the occasional issue here and there and enjoyed the cross-overs to my more regular books, but the magic died in one fell emo hair flip. Cut to last year when i heard that a reboot was in the works. NOT staring Tobey Maguire or Kirsten Dunst. This movie was going to going to be darker, grittier and with almost 100% less strutting, and i felt a pang of hope. Could this film help me forget about Venom being played by that dopey kid from "That 70's Show" and reignite the love I had for the character i cherished so much as a lad?

In a word, kinda.

As said before, The Amazing Spider-Man is a reboot of Sam Raimi's Spider-Man trilogy. Which means we start over with the most vaunted cliche in comic book movies, the origin story. I don't know a single person who doesn't know Peter Parker's origin, but that's OK if it still tells it in a provocative way. Marc Webb seemed to go out of his way to portray James Garfield's Peter Parker as a everyman. I don't mean that in a way that he is relateable to the common guy, but as Parker can do EVERYTHING. Smart, check. Good looking, check. Good at technology, check. Good at sports, check. Impeccable taste in movies, check. (he's got a framed poster of Rear Window in his room) The only thing he doesn't have going for him is he is technically an orphan and he has a lot of issues stemming from that fact like a lack of confidence. But you know what, Garfield pulls it off 85% of the time. He's believable when he displays emotion and the audience hurts when he does. that's a pretty impressive feat when it comes to a screen adaptation of a comic book. he does stumble occasionally, especially in the exchanges between him and Emma Stone's character (I would too, she is absolutely gorgeous). Speaking of Miss Stone, i have to say that besides being a pretty face, her acting leaves much to be desired. She comes off as the same in most roles she plays and her Gwen Stacy is no different. In the books, Gwen is portrayed as a strong female role, almost a foil to Mary Jane Watson and i wish some of that strength was evident in Miss Stone's performance. Rhys Ifans is the antagonist of the film playing the crippled geneticist Curt Connors/The Lizard. He is generally a joy to watch and is probably the best screen portrayal of a villain since Alfred Molina's excellent Doctor Octopus. The supporting cast is also quite enjoyable with Martin Sheen doing an excellent Uncle Ben (minus the preachiness from the other movies) Sally Fields as the hen-pecked Aunt May and Denis Leary as Gwen's father and police chief rounding out the notables.

The CGI in this film is pretty top-notch as well, turning Spider-Man loose to be the acrobatic hero we always wanted to see on film. The film is at its strongest when Spidey is in costume, doing his thing. The web slinging and neigh impossible dodges are expertly pulled off and shows that this is no regular acrobat in tights. The action scenes are cool and i think Spider-Man is at his best when fighting a physically superior opponent like the Lizard, when he is forced to use both his skills and smarts to prevail. Speaking of the Lizard, his CGI effects are pretty decent, but it all falls to pieces when he stops to speak. Referencing to books again, The Lizard is a mostly silent foe, more beast than man, and at most utters a few hisses and roars. I think the filmmakers would have benefited from sticking to this more closely.This is also a much gorier film then the previous trilogy. Guns are fired...a lot and *spoiler* the Lizards gets absolutely shredded by a hail of gunfire numerous times throughout.

Now for the film's flaws and its a mercifully short list. Besides the previously mentioned CGI hiccups with the Lizard and Emma Stone's acting, the only thing i can really detract from the movie is its pacing. This movie is painfully slow in the beginning, moving with all the speed and grace of a three-legged, wounded rhino. I cant help but feel that a lot of the movie was left on the editing room floor and it still takes FOREVER to get moving, but once it does pick up the pace, its quite enjoyable.

I will say that this reboot was by enlarge a success, setting up for sequels and leaving more then a few loose ends to be followed up on. Mr. Webb, please take my advice and keep the villain count to one per movie. Don't make the mistakes Mr. Raimi did with #3. This is by no means a masterpiece, but as far as comic movies go, it could be a hell of a lot worse.

7.5 out of 10

Now if you excuse me, i need to head to my local comic shop and catch up on a few back issues...i wonder what Venom has been up to lately...

Inaugural Post

Howdy Readers! And may i be the first to welcome you to Does This Pony Need Glasses? This is my first Blog and despite know next to nothing about blogging, I hope it will be a successful adventure. Now I know what you, the potential reader, may be thinking. "Who the hell is this guy and why should I give two bits about what he has to say?" Very good question reader and i applaud you for not bleeping out the swear. (This will be a "Rated T-for Teen" blog and I dont mind a little saucy language if it gets the blood flowing) Well, to answer that first part, let me give some brief background on myself. I am a 25 year old male living in Pittsburgh PA. I have a full time job and am engaged to the love of my life. (lets just call her E for short) I enjoy most things in life, like films, games, friends, family and sports. Also I'm an unabashed Brony. I really dont care what people think of me for being a fan of My Little Pony, it makes me happy and i want to share a little happiness with the rest of you. On to the second part of that question, with so many blogs out there about MLP and such, why should you care to read my thoughts. Well, I like to think I could bring a different perspective on the world from the aspect of a Brony (who is just slightly nutty). This will not be a pony only blog (though it will be a large part of my focus) but it will also be about life and the trials and tribulations of a typical person who happens to love MLP. I'll post when I find the time but look for the schedule to be a few posts a week. and I welcome any feedback which might help improve my humble blog. You can also follow me around equestriadaily.com, i post under the handle Joystik. Thanks for giving this blog a shot and I hope to impress you. Look for my next post in a few days.

Stay Magical

Joystik